Member-only story
Courage and Vulnerability, you can’t have one without the other
“The irony is that this ‘fake it till you make it’ tactic is the exact opposite of how truly successful people live. They live with authentic vulnerability because they know that the world always connects more with your grit than your shine. They might show up for the shine, but they will stay because of your grit.” — Joshua Medcalf
Be real and take a good look at your values.
As men, we are taught, at least in my city, to toughen up and be strong. It’s good advice, being strong, but it is more complicated than that. Because when you’re a kid, and you hear this advice, without it being explained entirely or correctly to you, you believe that you have to look strong and tough, instead of actually being strong and tough.
If you show that you are afraid, you are called a coward (a better word than what you are actually called, a pussy). You cannot look afraid, you have to save face.
And so life goes on and we learn to show we are tough instead of actually being tough. The paradoxical and funny thing is that by hiding from the world how we actually feel, we are in fact being cowards.
How so? Because vulnerability and courage are fundamentally intertwined.
